CAR CRASH — MY LAST AMERICAN CHRISTMAS

Published by Rick on Tagged Uncategorized

I’m not being colloquial here, we’re talking about an actual car crash that I was involved in just before I was to head out to California. When I last posted, it was to commemorate the 20th anniversary of my third and final wedding. My parents were still around but not very mobile at that time (and less than a year later, my mother would succumb to cancer), so they couldn’t come to England for the ceremony. We agreed to come to California and have a second ceremony at my parents’ house in Redlands. In the weeks before coming out there, I had a fairly lucrative run of gigs for December, working in Nottingham, Leicester, Exeter, Southampton, Birmingham, Guildford, London (How’d that get in there?), and Newbury.

There were also two nights booked in Cardiff, Wales, the two days before we left for LA, but something strange happened the night before on the way back from the Newbury (in County Berkshire, about 50 miles west of London) gig. It was at a local theatre, probably a 300-seater, fully packed, and the audience was absolutely lovely. Given the problems usually associated with so many December gigs, this was a godsend. People afterward kept wanting to talk to me and much as I wanted to hang around, I had about 75 miles to go back home to Dagenham, Essex. Driving was a bit of a problem for me, as I needed to get a UK driving license, but kept failing the test because there were rules on driving here that I didn’t know, plus I had old habits that the examiners said I would have to break before they could pass me. I had a provisional license, but my new wife had cautioned me after the second failure “What happens if you’re coming home from a gig and some drunk lunatic plows into you?” And her words came prophetically true on the M4 motorway just past Reading.

I was moving ahead at around 65-70 mph, and suddenly I saw a pair of headlights directly behind me getting rapidly closer to my car. There was no time to react. I got plowed into by a rather large van that must have been going 100 and I skidded, swerved, and spun for a good 100 feet before I could bring the car to a stop. I could see the driver of the van leaning out waving his arms as if to say he was sorry, but by the time I had gotten out of what remained of my car, he had pulled to the side of the road and took off running. I was also lucky that my car was headed for a metal barrier but spun away at the last second. I got out and for the first time ever in my life, I had a bloody nose. Considering the size of my nose, it’s quite an easy target, but it was bloody this time because the rear view mirror flew off on impact and hit me in the face.

I called 999 and was able to give a decent report to emergency services exactly where I was, but only because I noticed up ahead there was a lane closed off for road works. The police, tow truck, and ambulance all arrived in about 15 minutes, and when they noticed I had a provisional license, the policeman told me what loopholes there were so that I couldn’t be accused of driving illegally. The ambulance took me to a hospital in Slough, about ten miles away, where I had stitches put on the bridge of my nose. The ambulance drivers came close to volunteering to take me back to Dagenham, but got three calls almost immediately after this was proposed. I did manage to sleep at the hospital for about an hour, and had contacted the Mrs. who offered to skip work the next morning and come out to Slough to take me home. I still had blood all over my jacket and shirt, and thank god she could be there, as the blood on my clothes would have been hard to explain on public transit.

I rested, cancelled the dates in Cardiff, and happily was well enough two days later to fly to LA. When we arrived, we spent the first night in an airport hotel, and the next morning, I made an appointment to get my stitches taken out. This was a reminder of the disparate world of health insurance. The process of removing the stitches took about 30 seconds, but cost $125, where in UK it would cost nothing!

Next was the trip to Redlands, where we had an informal wedding ceremony for my parents, though my dad was ill and pretty much stayed in bed until it was time for the ceremony, then went back to bed. Really hard to believe that he would outlive my mom by over ten years, given his condition. The ceremony was officiated by my ex-partner Ruby’s husband, who was a minister. What was really nice was going out to dinner with Ruby (Monica), her husband, and my mom, who said nothing the whole evening, but I could tell she was enjoying being away from the house for awhile.

A few days later was Christmas, which we spent at my brother’s house, where we were treated very well, but it still felt strange, as we couldn’t bring many gifts because of travel restrictions. We spent most of Christmas morning watching my niece and nephew open their seemingly endless array of gifts. I had no idea at that time that this would potentially be my last Christmas in America. We left on the 29th, as I had a New Years gig at Jongleurs in Cardiff. I must say that I’m not sure if I’ll make many trips to America in the next four years. I’m not too keen on putting any money into the Trump economy, but maybe that’s petty. That’s as political as I’m going to get here. I hope you all spend the holidays with people you love!

December 19th, 2024



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